So after mild ppd after Loralei and after both miscarriages, you'd think I would have felt this one coming. The endless tears. The meaningless life. The homesickness. The loneliness. Sigh. My little baby is here and is just perfect. Isn't that what I sat up and prayed for night after night? So why the tears?
I am hoping it will pass quickly like it did with Loralei and I will begin to look forward to things again.
I hope the feelings I am having are hormonal and not some greater realization that I need more than being a mommy and a wife. I have thought about things I could do that I would get joy from since the income side of it isn't an issue at the moment. Maybe I will look into being a LLL leader. I would love to do some Airedale rescue but just not possible with small children and un tested dogs.
I wish we lived closer to family. Just sitting in my mom's living room watching sunday football sounds heavenly. Or maybe a Wegmans run with my dad. Why does it have to be so impossibly expensive to live near them. My choice seems to be being home with my kids or working but being near family. Sign.
Sorry for the vent. Hoping for sunnier skies tomorrow.
On a happy note, Michael had newborn pictures done yesterday and they are going to be fabulous!!! I can't wait to share them. I can't believe he is about 12 hours away from being a week old. This time last week labor was just really getting my full attention. Seems like just hours ago but also like a lifetime has passed.
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